Emergency Update: Nikki from The Bachelor

Note right sideburn halfway down cheek

Um, it has become clear to me based on tonight's episode of The Bachelor, that Nikki the amphibian CUTS HER SIDEBURNS. Repeat: Nikki CUTS HER SIDEBURNS. In her updo it was revealed beyond a reasonable doubt that she in fact has sideburns that go down her cheeks, part of which she lasers and the other part which she ARBITRARILY CUTS into SIDEBURNS. I appreciate your attention to this matter.