The Mighty Brought Low

So yesterday, Megan and I had agreed to meet at the Botkier sample sale in Soho at 10am, exactly when the sale started. Apparently there was some miscommunication between Megan and I where I had thought she HAD a doctor's appointment at 9:45am, but instead she had predicted she would be getting OUT OF the doctor's appointment at 9:45, so in any event I receive an irate call from her at 9:57am asking where the hell I am because she was going to be at the sale in 5 seconds and I better be there or else. I had just come back from my morning constitutional with Perry and I had zero makeup on my face but Megan's fury is not something to be trifled with, so I put on my sunglasses, grab my gym bag, get a cab and generally act like a loser speeding down to a sale.

For those of you unfamiliar with Botkier, it is a brand of very EXPEN$$IVE and luxxxurious leather bags that only the best looking, richest and coolest people wear, and when you wear them all your wildest fantasies come true. The bags normally go for around $550, so when there's a sale, people such as myself lose their shit to stand in line for 45 minutes, rummage through two-season-old bags, buy ten of them and act like I bought them full price and then sneer at the poor people on street who wear bags by Mark Jacobsen and Praba. A few months ago, Botkier had a sample sale and Megan and I went during work for 3 hours and nearly lost our jobs, but it was worth it because we got some good shit and bragged about it for a few days. Anyway, so I roll up to the sale and Megan's already inside and there's a line out the door like it's the Tomb of the Holy Selpulchre and obviously as I'm standing there waiting in a line to buy discount bags looking like an idiot in gym clothes and no makeup, some jerk from Racked decides it would be a great idea to take a picture of me looking like a monster and posts it on their website. Um, this is not ok.