Monday, April 20, 2009
Only in New York
Yesterday was my mom's birthday, so Aliza and I hailed a cab on 1st Avenue, to take us to the restaurant because we live like sultans and can do that sort of thing. So we get in the cab carrying a bouquet of flowers and tell him that we need to go downtown (1st Ave goes uptown only). I comment to Aliza that the cab seems weird - it doesn't have the normal consul, there appears to be no credit card machine and the taxi tv doesn't work. When the light turns green, the cab driver MAKES A LEFT HAND FROM THE RIGHTMOST LANE on 1st Avenue, cutting across about 3 lanes of uptown traffic. Cars slam on brakes and nearly crash into the left side of the cab, I start screaming to the cab driver "This might be a bad idea, I don't have health insurance" and just as he has successfully cut off cars with nearly two collisions, we hear a police siren. The cab driver is now driving downa the one-way cross-town street off of 1st ave, being followed by the police. Me and Aliza are looking are like dying of laughter at this point becuase the guy just keeps on driving and doesn't pull over. Finally he does, and two cops get out of their car, walk up to the cab and knock on the door. They tell the cab driver to turn off the engine, PUT HIS HANDS ABOVE HIS HEAD, and then ask for his license and registration.
At this point me and Aliza are like, crap, mom and dad are going to be pissed if we're late, so lower my window and say to the cop, "Um, can we go now? I have to Twitter about this" and the cop ignores us, so me and Aliza hop out of the cab and walk to 2nd avenue laughing about the situation. We then hail another cab which had a small woman driver. We get in and tell her that we're going to Houston and LaGaurdia and that we were just pulled over in another cab. The cab driver says nothing and then pulls into traffic on 2nd avenue where she PROCEEDS TO REAR END THE CAB DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF HER. The cabdriver of the cab she hits open his door, turns around and giver her a nasty look, and she says "sorry" to him and then looks at me and Aliza in the rearview mirror as we're doubled over in laughter and literally losing our shit. I was Twittering this frantically and Aliza was just shaking her head and muttering. It was truly glorious.