Thursday, September 25, 2008
Not Acceptable - Acqua di Gio
I just passed by some guy on the street who was doused in Acqua di Gio. I was immediately transported back to my 8th grade dance where I played the role of Eponine to my crush, James, who instead of having a crush on me, had a crush on Danit, and at James' behest I was facilitating the communication between he and Danit. Needless to say everyone at the dance was either dripping in CK One or Acqua di Gio and the place smelled like someone marched into CVS, broke the ridiculous glass protecting the "priceless" perfumes like Adidas and Lady Stetson and then bashed all of the bottles on the floor and walked out.
In any event, I think it's pretty clear that wearing Acqua di Gio is absolutely unacceptable because it not only smells like someone poured kerosene on a bar of Irish Spring soap, but it is also 100% ridiculous to be wearing cologne that was last popular in 1992 AT BEST. I mean, why not just start wearing Cool Water by Davidoff or Drakkar Noir. Or if you're female, why not just slather on Love's Baby Soft or Sunflowers by Elizabeth Arden and then hit up the Blind Melon concert. Is this a joke.