Monday, September 29, 2008

Why the Terrorists Have Already Won

On my way back from gymnasio today, I stopped into Pommes Frites* so that any exercise performed at the gym would be immediately counteracted by greasy fries. As I was placing my order, a morbidly obese couple hoisted themselves off the stools at the counter and started waddling toward the door. The guy had a repulsively smooth milky white gizzard neck and his wife was clutching a Venti Frapuccino and was jammed into her Lane Bryant Secret Slimmer jeans (the secret being that they in no way make you look slimmer). The guy announced, "Yum, that was good!" and then asked the woman working the deep fryer IF THEY EVER HAD TWO FOR ONE DEALS. The woman obviously looked at him in disbelief and said that they sometimes have coupons. I honestly don't know what to say about this. I am completely speechless and deeply horrified that following the aforementioned events I proceeded to buy fries and then eat them.

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