Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Missed Connections Needed ASAP


When I'm bored at work which is mainly every day, I check the Craigslist Missed Connections to see if anyone has seen me on the street and fallen in love with me from afar. A few times people have posted about some blondes at the Equinox gym that I go to, but one of the times they described her as always being on the elliptical, which is a lame fake workout and obviously not me, and the other time as "being extremely thin and Swedish looking" which sounded like me except for the being extremely thin and Swedish looking part. Normally I'm only mildly insulted that people aren't posting about me, but I actually become enraged when I make a concerted effort to look good in bars after work or on the subway and NO ONE is posting a missed connection about me, which is not legitimate.

Take, for instance, last night. I went to a bar with my friend Jen in midtown. I was wearing a sextacular work dress that had received compliments yesterday from my secretary, and generally shit was looking relatively top notch. Obviously the bar was filled with men in suits and I saw a few of them checking me out, but no one approached me. "That's okay," I thought to myself, "they will definitely post about me tomorrow on Missed Connections," but I just checked and unless someone mistook me for the Asian beauty on the G train, no one has posted about me. Or the time I DEFINITELY made eye contact with a cute and r$ch looking guy on the subway - no Missed Connection post - WTF. Can people please get on this? Thanks.

11 comments:

JC said...
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Unknown said...

This previous poster's comments have convinced me to finally end it all. I'm moving to the Midwest where I will be appreciated.

JC said...
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Robespierre said...

I believe with perfect faith in my soulmate's coming. Yea, though he tarry, yet I still believe.

JC said...
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Anonymous said...
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Unknown said...

i thought i was your soulmate.

JC said...
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Anonymous said...
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JC said...
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megan said...

crate, i don't post anonymously, and besides, my shakespearean-style prose is rusty. i don't know who made those anonymous comments.