No News is Good News

So last night I had tuned in to watch The Bachelor, and then got bored because he sucks so I took a shower. I came out and apparently Perry was bored too and had switched the channel... to the news, which I find even more boring than math, if that is even possible. I actually stopped watching the news when George W. Bush was elected President - I remember I was in my dorm junior year and he won and I announced that I would not be watching the news anymore for at least 4 years, which I haven't unless you are counting 20/20 or Dateline which has more of the news stories I care about, like people getting switched at birth or the toothpaste industry duping people. The headline last night was "Hillary and Obama: A War of Words" which is ridiculous because every time I mistakenly turn on the news or Perry jumps on the remote those two are always yelling and backhandedly insulting each other and they just need to calm down because nobody cares.

Luckily, all the news that I need to know is in Us Magazine, In Touch, Perez Hilton and occasionally People, which sometimes covers politics which makes it boring 40% of the time. Frankly, if it's not on Access Hollywood, it's pretty safe to say I'm not interested. Even sometimes Access Hollywood covers crap, like when they spend 15 minutes talking about Dancing with the Stars, which is a terrible show. I just don't understand how I'm supposed to be interested in daily coverage of the war in Iraq (other than the fact that I do care when people get killed there) when it's been going on for 20 years and everything looks very dusty and we're just storming towns and shooting at sand and I'm not really sure what we're doing there because no article anywhere ever explains so that people who don't read the news religiously can know. I do know, however that some pretty lame celebrities have been visiting the troops, but I guess if you're in a desert, Lisa Rinna or Danny Bonaduce is better than no one.