Saturday, July 26, 2008

Things I Do When I See A Gorgeous Pair of Louboutins on Ebay

Papa, can you hear me?
Papa, can you see me?

Papa can you find me in the night?

Papa are you near me?

Papa, can you hear me?

-"Yentl"

1. Punch myself out
2. Send the link to 8 people
3. Try and decipher who the jerks are that are bidding on the shoes
4. Check my checking account balance to see if I can afford them
5. Remind myself that I don't need them
6. Send emails to people of the male persuasion hinting that it might be a good idea to buy these for me if they know what's best
7. Upon receipt of emails saying "I'm not going to buy shoes for you," reply by saying "Consider our relationship over" and immediately block them from gchat
8. Review contents of closet to see if anything can be sold on ebay to offset the price of said shoes
9. Make shoes my computer wallpaper

1 comment:

narixx said...

This post would make a great short film. Maybe a jerky, amateur 35-mm production that starts out Chaplin-style.

The GChat block would clearly be the dramatic climax of the piece. 'Set as Desktop background?' should effectively resolve the conflict for viewers.

ARE YOU THERE, SPIELBERG? IT'S ME, MARIN.