Friday, May 16, 2008

Bloodline

My favorite painting (well, it's a fresco) of all time: The Lamentation by Giotto


The other day I walked by the East Village Cinemas and I saw a poster for a movie called Bloodline that was a picture of stained glass window with Jesus and Mary Magdalene in it which meant that I would be seeing it ASAP. I very rarely see movies because a) on an episode of 20/20 they did swab tests of movie theatre seats and they came back with fecal matter on them, b) I can't stand to sit in a dark room for 3 hours and I get bored and want to leave, and c) movie theatres are generally disgusting. In any event, I make exceptions for epic battle movies like 300 and 10,000 B.C. and also for documentaries, especially documentaries about Jesus, whom I love for no good reason being that I am Jewish.



If you check out the trailer, it pretty much seems like the best movie of all time because it says point blank that the greatest secret in the world that has been hidden for centuries will be revealed and that everything told to me previously was a lie, and this is EXACTLY the sort of thing I need to know about in order to keep on top of the secrets of the universe. I have been watching the trailer all day long today and calling up people and reading the printed lines from the trailer's intro in a very haunting voice in order to get people to come with me, but it is not working because other people apparently don't want to find out the shocking truths of history and discover that Jesus and Mary Magdalene have a bloodline and that their great-great-great-great (x 20) grandkids are working in the duplicating department at their law firms.

3 comments:

Maria said...

Um, have you seen/read the Da Vinci Code?

scott said...

Another Roadside Attraction is awesome Catholic secrecy in full effect.

Umberto Eco's Foucault's Pendulum is also pretty cool.

Holy Blood, Holy Grail is good , but too serious.

I, too, am a Jew with a Catholic obsession.

rachel said...

I got you link from another blog and have not been able to stop reading! A) you are hilarious b) I can relate to almost every post. Especially this one. I too am a jew with an unusual love jesus. If it weren't creepy I would offer to go with you- especially because I know nobody I know will want to go with me. Thanks for the headsup though. I look forward to hearing your comments post movie.